Girls' Frontline: My Apocalypse with Dolls

Page 472

He took another step forward, hoping to comfort her in her favorite way, but when he took that first step, that simplest of movements, it broke his heart.

She... stepped back, just like that. Her furrowed brows and that unfamiliar and fearful gaze were also transmitted to her heart. All the pain she had felt from the past to the present seemed less despairing than this moment.

This despair stems from denial...

"Are you afraid of me...?"

"You've kept this from me for so long, is it because your profession has always been murder?"

Every question she asked left Luo Fan speechless. He realized that he could not answer any of her questions directly. This sense of powerlessness was terrifying, yet he could not resist it.

Murder is murder, an undeniable fact for any person with normal values. But what's regrettable is that she was that kind of person. If she didn't have that characteristic, how could he have been so infatuated with her?

But now, it seems I can no longer hide it from her like I used to...

Should I explain to her that I killed these people for a greater purpose, to save the world?

Perhaps in the past he could have stood up and responded in such a way, but now, just imagining those words makes him want to laugh in disgust.

776 Where did she go?

Looking back on their past experiences, they were so full of vigor, managing to navigate the encirclement of zombies and Umbrella with ease. They successfully escaped Raccoon City while achieving their goals, enjoyed a pleasant vacation in Hawaii, and then settled in New York, ushering in a new era for White Eagle Pharmaceuticals. This also shook up the order of both the legal and illegal worlds, and even marked a pivotal moment in their own lives... They rediscovered Yingque...

Even though the process was somewhat bumpy, there was still a group of seemingly dangerous people helping me. It was because of them that I was able to get to where I am today. But more importantly, the dolls—without them, I would not have achieved my current success. They are the primary contributors to building my vision.

Everything was going smoothly, just like in a fairy tale, but where did things go wrong? Why did things turn out this way? Is there some unseen hand driving all of this?

His self-doubt, despair for life, and the conflict between his vision and morality made his already shattered heart even more broken. He was really tired. He didn't know how to answer her. He gave a resigned, cold laugh and slowly raised his eyes. Strange mandala patterns appeared in his right eye.

"What do you hope to hear from me this time?"

Rather than asking a question, it sounded more like sarcasm. Ying Que couldn't possibly have missed the hidden meaning in it, but his lack of denial was even more disappointing.

Did I truly love him unconditionally and without complaint? But what did I get in return? Besides one unspeakable lie after another, what else did I receive?

The ever-growing sense of distance, the attacks from events that didn't belong to her own world, even so, she never regretted loving him, but the result told her that the person she deeply loved was actually a ruthless killer.

"I... I no longer expect to hear anything, and I don't even know if I can still believe what's happening before my eyes..."

She slowly lowered her head. Unexpectedly, she took the initiative to give in. Luo Fan was stunned. It was precisely this concession that made him suddenly panic.

"I just wanted to...!"

Luo Fan strode forward, but Ying Que retreated again, raising her right hand at the same time...

She slowly raised her head and looked at the man in front of her...

"...!"

That smile was so lonely and desperate, and his teary eyes made one want to wipe them away, but an invisible wall always blocked his way, making people hesitate to approach.

"Perhaps we both need time to calm down. Let's give each other some time, okay...?"

......

"...I see."

Luo Fan ultimately suppressed his inner desires and grievances, and slowly retreated. This time, he also chose to give in.

Perhaps she's right. We both need time to calm down. No matter how harsh or wronged we've been treated, it doesn't change the harm we've caused her. Let's keep things separate...

He gradually retreated until he disappeared at the end of the stairs. When the last sound of his footsteps also faded from her ears, she felt her legs go weak and sat blankly on the ground, like a kite with a broken string.

Where exactly did we go wrong, and why can't we go back to the past...?

When Lovan returned to the bar lobby, he ran into 191 and 95, who were returning from buying groceries. Neither of them had participated in the massacre of the Umbrella branch, and Lovan did not tell them the details. Instead, he sent them away to prepare dinner for the evening.

However, for now, we'll have to postpone dinner for a while...

191 exclaimed excitedly, "Commander, I remember today is the Winter Solstice, right? We've just finished preparing all the dishes, when... eh?"

Luo Fan slowly walked past the two of them and went straight to the bar entrance. The light snow falling from the sky seemed to freeze even the tear stains on his face. Every breath he exhaled was enough to make him feel like his liver and gallbladder were about to burst.

95 immediately sensed something was wrong and stepped forward to gently pat his shoulder: "Commander, what happened?"

"Is there anything we can do to help?"

191 didn't even bother cooking and asked softly, but when the two tried to observe Luo Fan's expression, he slowly turned his head away and looked to the side.

"Please, just consider this my request, don't ask anymore, okay?"

"...!"

The two women exchanged a glance, probably guessing that something bad had happened. Regardless of the outcome, they decided not to try to find out more and to focus on finishing the food they had on hand.

When they arrived outside the bar, several jeeps and vans were already parked across the street, for the girls to use for cleaning up and transporting equipment and tools.

Looking at everyone greeting each other in the back seat and driver's seat, 95 had a different thought...

......

So, we'll just have to make do with tonight's winter solstice...

"I must say, this beef is quite delicious. Commander, you should eat more."

The executioner was quick to grab food, so Luo Fan could get a share, but ultimately, no one would compete with Luo Fan for food at this time.

Of all those present, only Luo Fan looked the most disheveled.

The group parked the van and jeep together, opened the back seats, and connected the induction cooker. That's how they solved a simple dinner.

Although no one knew what had happened between the Commander and Yingque, everyone tacitly refrained from asking and simply focused on eating, even though it was a bit cold outside.

191 added more meat to the pot, laughing occasionally, "It's a special offer from Walmart after the discount. 95 and I finally managed to snag it. The pot was packed with people."

“There’s still some wine here,” M16 said, pouring a full glass of wine for Luo Fan. “It’s white, don’t ask me where we got it.”

There aren't enough people tonight, only a handful. Everyone is busy, and even at a time like this, we can't get together for a proper meal.

Luo Fan was therefore disinterested. He seemed to have no interest in how the dinner tasted, but was thinking about how to live his life in the future.

He couldn't understand why his resourcefulness had become meaningless at this moment, but at least one thing wouldn't lie to him.

That's the chili peppers that 191 and 95 put in the pot.

It was very spicy, but surprisingly good. I hope our lives can be as flavorful as they are now in the future.

......

The next day, Luo Fan woke up early in the car. She seemed to have drunk quite a bit last night. The girls were still asleep, so she decided to go back and check on them. Maybe she would calm down by the next day?

Perhaps he was just being too hasty and wanted to see a good result as soon as possible.

But when he arrived at the second floor of the bar, he did not see that familiar figure, and even the room they shared was empty.

Where did she go...?

777 The Lost One

He didn't intend to ask the tenants living in the house. Given their personalities, they probably wouldn't care where the lady of the house was. It was neither necessary nor polite. Instead, he should ask the androids responsible for her safety.

Knocking on a nearby door, in a room also on the second floor, Luo Fan seemed to have not spoken to her for a long time. After all, things had been relatively peaceful at the bar recently, with nothing affecting the activities there, so she could focus on her work.

"agent?"

The person who answered the door was none other than his most humble maid and agent. Compared to Sirius and Dido, they seemed to have a self-conscious and etiquette-obsessed personality, but they were all active in front of him. She, on the other hand, was the one who was taciturn from beginning to end, but silently did everything well.

Luo Fan was filled with mixed emotions. Since entrusting Ying Que to her care, there had never been any safety issues. Now that the shrike had taken over her job, she was finally able to relax completely and do what a maid should do in the bar. If the bar was a mansion and Luo Fan was the master, then the agent was the loyal servant who diligently managed the mansion's affairs from beginning to end after the master left home.

The appropriateness of "blind loyalty" depends on the strength of its master, but Luo Fan is not sure whether the agent's loyalty is blind loyalty. However, he only needs to understand one thing: she will never betray him and will face him with the utmost loyalty.

Good morning, Master. I hope the cold wind of last night did not diminish the sharpness in your face.

She bowed slightly to greet her master. Luo Fan chuckled, her voice sharp and piercing. She wished she could maintain such a good mindset to preserve this outward appearance.

But he couldn't do it; the fierce muscles on his face gradually collapsed as he grew weary.

“Good morning, Agent,” he nodded in response, maintaining the demeanor befitting a commander and host. “I hope the work at the bar hasn’t been too stressful for you lately?”

He laughed awkwardly, suddenly realizing that he was no longer good at speaking in a natural and relaxed style...

So much so that the agent noticed Luo Fan's unusual behavior immediately. Instead of responding right away, she stared at him intently, as if scrutinizing him, yet with a hint of pity in her eyes—the kind of look that appears in the eyes of every girl.

When Luo Fan saw those looks, he felt heartache and self-reproach.

"You're looking for Miss Yingque, aren't you?"

"......Yes."

She immediately saw through Luo Fan's intention. In the past, he would have awkwardly smiled to ease the atmosphere, but now, he just froze his smile and finally fell silent, responding calmly.

......

She... went to the park.

"......Yeah?"

......

......

"Damn, I can't take it anymore, I'm exhausted, I need to rest...!"

Her backpack fell to the ground, and Anjie quickly took off her cotton-padded coat and sat down against a spruce tree.

Upon seeing this, the rebellious squad and the ship girls who were walking in front also stopped and sat down around Ange. There was nothing they could do, since she was the weakest human in the team.

The bright sunshine shone on her body, and the weather was unusually kind, adding a touch of color to this rare journey. Even after taking off her cotton-padded coat, Anjie did not feel cold at all, perhaps because the amount of exercise she had done was enough to warm her up.

Clark Lake National Park is much larger than expected. The group had already hiked 10 kilometers and hadn't even covered a third of the distance. Along the way, they saw a few moose and snow hares. If it weren't for the fact that Clark Lake is also one of the largest nature reserves in Alaska, Ange would definitely have had the girls catch a few to roast.

"Has Anjie been neglecting her exercise lately? She doesn't seem as strong as I thought."

RPK took out a thermos and handed it to Anjie. Anjie quickly filled a glass with water and gulped it down. It was still a little warm. Although it wasn't as refreshing as drinking alcohol, it was much healthier.

“I ran alongside you the whole time during the war, but that place wasn’t snowy,” Ange said, feeling a thud under her bottom. She pulled out a pine cone from below and tossed it away. “Luo Fan should come to places like this too. He needs to straighten out his mindset.”

AN94 nodded slowly: "It's a pity the Commander didn't want to come; he's much busier than he realizes..."

"94, if you personally invite him, the commander will definitely come, do you believe me?"

AK12 started joking again, as she usually does. In the past, 94 would have blushed and denied it outright, but now she wouldn't think that way. After all, everyone has seen the changes in Luo Fan.

"I hope so... If the commander is willing to spare me, then I'll surely succeed..."

The sudden sadness made the atmosphere somewhat oppressive. Enterprise realized that something was wrong, so she pulled Essex to sit around in front of Ange and the Rebellious Squad. Jiang Feng and Xiang He, who were nearby, also joined in and chatted about the issues they had always been concerned about.

Opening a can of beef, Enterprise tentatively asked, "Um, was the Commander like this before we arrived?"

RPK always enjoyed discussing these emotional topics, but just as she was about to speak, a colder and more resolute voice spoke in her place...

"No, no, the former commander was completely different from the current one."

Everyone was surprised and looked at the owner of the voice, AK15, the taciturn, efficiency-obsessed member of the rebellious squad. Even Ange, the team leader, did not expect her to answer the question.

If she can sense the changes, then just how significant are those changes?

AK15 will never forget that when they first arrived in this world, Luo Fan explained the situation and system of this world to them. At that time, he was very reserved and even couldn't believe that they were really here. When he spoke, he had a self-talk style, like a stand-up comedy routine, but he always made everyone smile. When you need psychological counseling, he will act as a close friend by your side and help you solve your problems.

"Close friend" is merely an apt metaphor, but for each other, it truly represents a close and inseparable relationship.

Only the girls themselves know the truth...

He can save all those he loves and who love him.

He couldn't save himself...

He was trapped, he lost his way, and he embarked on a path of self-destruction, without even knowing how far this path would lead.

The reason for this is simply an unquestionable love for everyone...

778 War?

"From the moment I met him, he was already engaged in various missions to fight those monsters... although I'm not sure if 'missions' is the right word..."

Jiang Feng couldn't help but feel moved, his thoughts seemingly returning to that night, to the train heading towards the quarantine zone, to the night they embraced tightly.

He was very different back then compared to now...

"It's a pity we're a little late..." Shoukaku feigned ease, looking at the magnificent spectacle of the Tyndall effect: "If we hadn't been by his side sooner, if there had been one more kiss, one more hug, or even... one more child, would he be completely different now?"

He captivated us all with his love, but only now do we realize how helpless we are in the face of his predicament. We can fight for him, we can accompany him through every ordinary and repetitive day, but we cannot untangle the knot in his heart.

"That's really unfair to the commander..."

Essex whispered.

As the topic grew increasingly heavy, Anjie frowned slightly, got up from the ground, and brushed off the snow that had gotten on her.