Genshin Impact: My roommate and I became funny Hilichurls

Page 98

Bugs Bunny almost choked on his own saliva. He patted his chest with his paw, looking incredulous.

"My God! If you want to eat fish, can't you catch it by fishing or netting? Or just buy it at the market! Why fry it?! This sounds like... like using a cannon to kill a mosquito, and the mosquito was one you raised yourself!"

“Sigh, they’ve done this kind of thing with Claire before.”

Yura explained, her tone filled with sympathy for the Knights of Favonius's logistical work.

"The first time, Gu Qian was too big to fit into a regular solitary confinement cell, so Commander Qin had no choice but to punish him by making him clear road obstacles outside the city. As a result, he finished three days' worth of work in half a day by himself, and also leveled several Hilichurl camps in the process..."

"Later, the Knights simply allocated a special fund to build a 'specially made solitary confinement cell' next to the main solitary confinement cell, which was spacious enough, with thicker walls and higher door frames, specifically to hold the four of them."

Bugs Bunny was dumbfounded. After a long while, he shook his head and exclaimed in a tone that was a mixture of sympathy and schadenfreude, "Oh my God, what a tragedy... A solitary confinement cell built especially for them? Is that some kind of 'honor'?"

He spoke of sorrow, yet he happily pulled out another carrot and continued munching on it, clearly considering it the perfect accompaniment to his meal... uh, the carrot story.

------

Meanwhile, in the Grand Master's office of the Knights of Favonius.

The troupe leader was facing a "guest" who was several times taller than her and exuded an invisible sense of oppression. She felt more exhausted than when dealing with ten piles of documents.

"Mr. Wang Hassan".

Qin tried her best to keep her voice steady and polite, even though she really wanted to grab her hair and scream inside.

"I implore you again, and with utmost seriousness, please... stop fooling around with those four honorary knights and Klee, okay?"

The incident also started with "fishing with explosives," but Wang Hassan's involvement escalated the nature of the matter from "mischief" to an "ecological disaster."

When Jean received the report and rushed to the shore of Starfall Lake, the sight she saw almost made her faint—the four-person group and Klee were excitedly preparing various types of bouncy bombs, while King Hassan, standing next to them, seemed to be consulted on "how to efficiently obtain fish."

This Grand Assassin didn't pull out any explosives; he didn't even make any obvious movements.

However, the white light in the skeletal eye sockets flickered slightly, locking onto a lake surface teeming with fish.

The next moment, it was as if karmic fire from the underworld suddenly ignited!

It was no ordinary flame; it was a pale fire carrying the aura of death and annihilation, which instantly covered the entire lake surface!

There was no explosion, no splashing water, only a deathly silence of burning.

Where the flames swept, the lake water did not boil, but instead "disappeared" in part, revealing the dried-up lakebed. The fish and shrimp in the water were not even left with ashes, as if they had been wiped out from the very level of existence!

A lake area was instantly transformed into a no-man's-land!

If it weren't for Zhang Chu's quick reaction upon arrival, pulling out a device that looked like a high-pressure water gun, and Qingyu and Erkang frantically pouring out spare water and fish fry from the Chenge Pot for "ecological restoration," Xingluo Lake would probably have had to be renamed "Xingluo Pit."

When King Hassan heard Qin's request (or rather, pleading), his massive skeletal skull lowered slightly, its empty eye sockets "gazing" at Qin.

The air in the office seemed to freeze.

A few seconds later, he slowly responded in that deep, ancient voice, which seemed to echo itself:

"Yes, I understand."

Upon hearing this, the head of the troupe finally felt relieved, her heart finally settling back into her stomach. She breathed a sigh of relief, almost as if she had collapsed, and quickly said, "Thank you very much for your understanding, Mr. Wang Hassan!"

She secretly rejoiced. Although this old man was incredibly powerful and his style of doing things was unpredictable, he was at least willing to communicate and could admit his mistakes and correct them... maybe?

However, what Wang Hassan said next made Qin's heart leap into the air once again:

"However, my skills are indeed not suited for fishing and hunting."

He stated it calmly, as if discussing today's weather.

"Next time, perhaps we could try... imbuing the fish with the concept of death, precisely targeting their spiritual bodies without harming their physical forms; that might be more efficient."

Qin: "!!!"

Introducing the concept of death?! Using this thing to catch fish?! This is more terrifying than boiling a lake dry!

"No! No need! Mr. Wang Hassan! Really, no need!"

Qin almost screamed, but she quickly waved her hands.

"I really wouldn't dare trouble you with such a trivial matter as fishing! Leave it to Klee... uh, no, leave it to the professional fishermen! Or let those four honorary knights use their lightning hammers to fish... although I don't encourage it either, it's at least better than bringing death upon them!"

Good heavens, what am I even comparing?! The Grand Master of the Knights of Favonius is comparing which fishing method is less environmentally damaging and more humane?!

Wang Hassan seemed puzzled by Qin's intense reaction, but he did not insist. He simply nodded slightly, and his figure disappeared slowly into the office as if blending into the shadows, leaving behind Commander Qin, who was still in shock and felt as if she had lost several years of her life, alone in front of a table full of documents, contemplating life.

Lord Barbatos...

If you are truly watching Mondstadt, could you please...

Should we give these visitors from another world a little more control?

If this continues, I'm afraid Mondstadt won't even survive the next crisis; it'll be 'saved' and disintegrated by them in all sorts of unexpected ways...

Meanwhile, inside the confinement room.

The four people who were facing the wall (actually, they were playing the Seven Saints Summoning game together) sneezed loudly at the same time.

Er Kang rubbed his nose and asked in confusion, "Strange, who's talking about us?"

Qingyu threw down a card, unimpressed: "It must be that Commander Qin is having trouble with our affairs again."

Zhang Chu adjusted his mask: "Or perhaps he's thanking us for stopping Grandpa Wang Hassan's 'grilled fish plan' in time."

Gu Qian nodded sheepishly, "Yeah, I think so too."

Beside them, Klee was obediently (forced) writing a self-criticism, her little face full of grievance: "But... catching fish using Grandpa's method is really fast... but all the fish are gone..."

Outside the window, the sky over Mondstadt remained azure. A free wind swept through the city, bringing the fresh scent of carrots (thanks to Bugs Bunny), a faint, almost imperceptible smell of burnt meat (a remnant of King Hassan), and... the heated debate emanating from the confinement cell about whether the next meal should be grilled fish or honey-glazed carrot and meat stew.

For Mondstadt, it was another peaceful and... "energetic" day.

Chapter 117 The Greatest Challenge

"Goodbye everyone! This place was great, I had a lot of fun!"

Bugs Bunny stood beside a rabbit hole that had appeared out of nowhere in the center of the square, its edges slightly distorted by cartoonish shapes. He waved his paws casually at the crowd, and even had half a Mondstadt carrot in his mouth as a "souvenir".

His leisurely demeanor made him seem less like someone embarking on a world tour and more like someone going for a casual visit to the neighbor's house.

Goodbye, Brother Rabbit! Come visit again sometime!

The four of them pulled out four handkerchiefs of different colors from somewhere, fluttering in the wind, and waved them in unison, forcing out a few "reluctant" tears on their faces. Their exaggerated acting was quite remarkable.

Upon hearing the words "Come visit often," the troupe leader standing behind them instantly turned from his normal fair complexion to an unsightly liver color. His lips trembled, and he almost choked on his breath.

Bugs Bunny's visit turned the Lawrence family into the biggest laughing stock in Mondstadt. While it was satisfying, what if he did it a few more times?

She felt her hairline receding at a visible rate!

Under the (mixed) gazes of everyone, Bugs Bunny winked at them, then nimbly leaped and accurately jumped into the rabbit hole.

The opening disappeared into the air as if erased by an eraser, leaving only a few carrot tendrils swirling in the wind.

Just as everyone (mainly Jean) was about to breathe a sigh of relief, King Hassan, who had been standing quietly like a background figure, turned to his temporary master Erkang, along with the Hundred-Faced Hassan behind him who seemed to be shivering even in the sunlight.

“Contractor, now that this matter is settled, we should also depart.”

Wang Hassan's ancient, deep voice rang out, completely calm and composed.

"Huh? You're leaving already?"

Er Kang was somewhat surprised and scratched his head.

"Should we go say goodbye to Keli? That little girl will probably be talking about you for a long time."

"It doesn't have to be this way."

As he spoke, Wang Hassan produced a folded black cloak from somewhere and handed it to Erkang.

Give this item to her.

Er Kang took the cloak and felt that the material was peculiar, neither cloth nor leather, with a slight coolness and an indescribable sense of weight.

He instinctively opened it and took a look—

"puff--!"

Er Kang almost spat it out.

What should have been a pure black, somber, and death-filled Grand Assassin cloak was now embroidered with a cute dog head (possibly Razor?), a round cat head (probably Diona?), several small cat paw prints, and even a miniature version of a grinning bouncy bomb!

"This...this is your cloak, isn't it, old man?!"

Er Kang pointed at the extremely incongruous cartoon images, his voice even changing tone.

"Just like that... What is this thing?! Has your taste been warped by Klee?!"

Wang Hassan's skeletal mask seemed to move slightly, but his voice remained steady: "This is the child's 'mending.' This object contains my aura, which can protect her and also conceal her existence from unnecessary prying."

Before Erkang could even complain, King Hassan and Hundred-Faced Hassan vanished like candles in the wind, quickly turning into specks of golden spirit particles and disappearing into the breeze of Mondstadt, as if they had never existed.

Er Kang, holding the cloak whose style had suddenly changed to "deathly cuteness," stood there stunned for a long time before finally covering his face in helplessness and letting out a sigh of knowing everything: "So... you really are still that tsundere granddaughter-obsessed old man!"

"I will give this cloak to Klee on my behalf."

The troupe leader walked over at some point, his face still somewhat ashen, but his tone left no room for argument.

She really didn't trust those four unreliable guys to deliver it. Who knew what kind of trouble they might cause on the way, or teach Klee some strange things (like using a cloak to enhance the concealment of the bomb?).

"Oh, okay, thank you for your help, Commander Qin."

Erkang readily handed over the cloak, as if it were a hot potato.

Watching the leader of the cloak leave with that extremely conspicuous cloak, Qingyu came over and nudged Erkang with his elbow: "Hey, you troublemaker, what are we going to do next? We need to find some fun, right? Has Mondstadt been too peaceful lately?"

Zhang Chu crossed his arms, thoughtfully stroking his chin: "Hmm... Should I go to Inazuma to see if Lei Movie has any new dessert inventions? Or should I go back to Sumeru to help Narcida 'optimize' the Church's management system? Or should I go to Fontaine to experience the latest floating court?"

Just as the group of four began to seriously (?) discuss their next "tourism (troublemaking) destination," a panicked figure scrambling and stumbling along, accompanied by shrill screams, approached from afar:

"Knights of Honor! Help—!!!"

The crowd looked in the direction of the sound and saw a young man dressed in ordinary Mondstadt citizen clothes, his hat askew, scrambling over, his face filled with fear, as if he had just been chased for eight blocks by the ruins guards.

"Huh? What's wrong, brother? Tell me slowly, did the sky fall or the earth collapse?"

Qingyu adopted his best "helpful citizen" demeanor and inquired.

"Yes, it's my home!"

The man was panting heavily as he pointed in the direction of the west of the city.